soooo, fourth year just started and....... HECK YEAH am i so pumped and ready to learn, to grow, and to see the way "Angelica Abad, BScN, RN" will shape out to be!! I've already done a couple of things that I probably wouldn't have done otherwise-- example: jumping the gun and contacting my preceptor first, who was impressed by my enthusiasm because, as he has said, "no student has ever contacted me first!" (and then we established out communication through text, where he texts like an actual Tito). but so far, fourth year has begun on a pretty enthusiastic note and i am so grateful for that.
i did my sim and skills lab by myself (as in, without signing up with a friend as a safety net. i just chose a date that would work and i happened to be in the same lab as people i already knew) and i am so glad i did! my sim lab group was small, but it was fun. for all the simulation labs we've had during nursing school, i've never been the nurse and i've always made an effort to avoid being the nurse. however, that day i volunteered to be the nurse for the second scenario, alongside stephanie. it was challenging, but so rewarding to be able to practice what may be a real scenario i could encounter within a safe space. All while being able to receive feedback from my peers and an experienced nurse! so i definitely wish i hadn't taken the sim labs for granted in the past, but that's all done and over with now.
and even though week 1 has just ended, there's already so many things to do that are piling up-- studying for HESI, reviewing for the NCLEX, group projects n such-- and it's getting a tad bit stressful, right now it's a good kind of stress. the wake up call stress that kicks your butt into action and makes you realize, "dude in 8 months i'd have graduated and on my way to getting my license. 4 years really few by". and i'm sure that is the reality check every one in this program, and all the friends that i have made over the years, are starting to realize now.
anyway, my first clinical day is on wednesday and i'm hella anxious but excited. im glad my preceptor seems willing to let me learn and willfully guide me on the right path, after being out of the game for a year and for being such a timid and shy nursing student for the first 2. it's never too late! the best time to start was yesterday, and the second best time to start is today as i always say. so praise God for allowing me to get here so far! and with all the support i have in my corner, i feel like no matter what may happen, i'll be able to get through it with my head held high. there's always something to be learned from every experience i have, but this year i'm going to take full advantage of the opportunities and keep seeing the positive in it all!
the starting point: reflecting on the last 3 years & a note to my future self
binge watching The Office? ✔
bumming around at home and taking frequent naps during the day? ✔✔
cracking open NCLEX review textbooks and preparing for 4th year? ✘✘✘✘✘
There is about one month left of summer break, which can be considered my last "stress-free, real summer" before becoming an 'adult' and 'finding a real job' related to my degree. However, it's definitely been a wild ride getting up to this point-- three rough years of nursing school, and I'm already approaching the final stretch! 😦
Where did all that time go? I think I've got a pretty good idea. Staying up until 4am taking notes on things I can barely remember now, practicing how to manually take blood pressure, making excessively thorough Anatomy and Pathology concept mind-maps for 9 hrs without using the washroom, lugging around 10000kg textbooks in my backpack, breaking down in the middle of the semester and questioning my choice in pursuing nursing, waking up at 5am and dreading the commute down to the hospital.....
The most important thing which has changed about me, though, is being excited of what is to come. Trusting in God and knowing that every single thing that happens to me is a lesson in which I have the ability to learn from, move on, and be even better than before. It's all a matter of being humble in mistakes and knowing that every person that you meet has something to offer in terms of knowledge and growth, regardless of their role or status. There will always be room for improvement.
bumming around at home and taking frequent naps during the day? ✔✔
cracking open NCLEX review textbooks and preparing for 4th year? ✘✘✘✘✘
There is about one month left of summer break, which can be considered my last "stress-free, real summer" before becoming an 'adult' and 'finding a real job' related to my degree. However, it's definitely been a wild ride getting up to this point-- three rough years of nursing school, and I'm already approaching the final stretch! 😦
Where did all that time go? I think I've got a pretty good idea. Staying up until 4am taking notes on things I can barely remember now, practicing how to manually take blood pressure, making excessively thorough Anatomy and Pathology concept mind-maps for 9 hrs without using the washroom, lugging around 10000kg textbooks in my backpack, breaking down in the middle of the semester and questioning my choice in pursuing nursing, waking up at 5am and dreading the commute down to the hospital.....
But after all is said and done, nursing school really isn't that bad. It's incredible how much a person can grow in such a short amount of time. In fact, these last 3 years of life in general have done a number on how fast I've grown into the person that I am. Getting my first job, forcing myself to network with other people, having the opportunity to work within incredible teams, and encountering my first stressful and demoralizing patient experience are just a few of many, many experiences which have catapulted my growth into a cool, hip, and (hopefully) self-sufficient young adult.
If I were to go back in time and ask my fresh-out-of-high-school self what kind of person she'd be in 3 years, I'm sure she would say "I don't know, but I hope she's not single" (in which I would not disappoint). My mindset has transformed into one that yearns to challenge myself to push myself out of my comfort zone-- saying "yes!" to every thing that comes my way and making the most out of it, whether it was a success or a missed opportunity which I can learn from, and exchanging confidence and self-efficacy in lieu of shyness and living in the fear of making mistakes. I consider this huge progress, considering how frustratingly meek and timid I've been my entire life.
If I were to go back in time and ask my fresh-out-of-high-school self what kind of person she'd be in 3 years, I'm sure she would say "I don't know, but I hope she's not single" (in which I would not disappoint). My mindset has transformed into one that yearns to challenge myself to push myself out of my comfort zone-- saying "yes!" to every thing that comes my way and making the most out of it, whether it was a success or a missed opportunity which I can learn from, and exchanging confidence and self-efficacy in lieu of shyness and living in the fear of making mistakes. I consider this huge progress, considering how frustratingly meek and timid I've been my entire life.
The most important thing which has changed about me, though, is being excited of what is to come. Trusting in God and knowing that every single thing that happens to me is a lesson in which I have the ability to learn from, move on, and be even better than before. It's all a matter of being humble in mistakes and knowing that every person that you meet has something to offer in terms of knowledge and growth, regardless of their role or status. There will always be room for improvement.
So, to the future me who will be reading this in 8 months: a big fat congratulations on making it this far! Remember when second-year Ange cried all the time but kept telling herself it's too late to quit because school was so damn expensive? She'd be glad that you decided to keep pushing on. Whether you're graduating this year, or if you need to take another year to obtain your degree-- really, it's not a big deal. It's just like what that stranger said to you on at the bus stop that one day: "It's all about the track, not the pace". Trust in God's plan!!
I know within these 8 months, you will have taken yet another giant leap forward in terms of your professional development. Hopefully you also have your G2 by this time, and that you no longer look like you're 12. Keep learning, keep taking these leaps of faith into the great unknown (but obviously, if you're going for job interviews or exams, stop winging them and actually prepare!!!), and keep putting in the work. Never stop learning. Keep the mindset that you have worked to hard to develop. And keep going to the gym (i hope you've transferred to Fit4Less bc Goodlife is hella expenive) because Lord knows how many patients you will need to assist to the washroom. So start on those gains.
I know within these 8 months, you will have taken yet another giant leap forward in terms of your professional development. Hopefully you also have your G2 by this time, and that you no longer look like you're 12. Keep learning, keep taking these leaps of faith into the great unknown (but obviously, if you're going for job interviews or exams, stop winging them and actually prepare!!!), and keep putting in the work. Never stop learning. Keep the mindset that you have worked to hard to develop. And keep going to the gym (i hope you've transferred to Fit4Less bc Goodlife is hella expenive) because Lord knows how many patients you will need to assist to the washroom. So start on those gains.
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